Seriously, Why?
Why do accidents happen? Is there some “cosmic” reason that I haven't heard and that's why everything's in disarray? Or was there an announcement that I didn't get to hear since I was sound asleep in bed?
Why do we meet people? Why do I? Why do I even bother?
Why do I surf the internet? Why am I so voracious for information? Why am I curious?
Why did I go on-line and sign up at fling.com? Why did I meet people? Why did I make friends?
Why did I connect with Carl? Why did I get close to him? Why did I continue conversing with him about pretty much everything?
Why did I keep on going back for more at fling? What made me so “powerful” that I was clicking and just adding total strangers as friends?
Why did they approve? Why did they talk to me? Why were they interested? Was it primarily because I tickled their fancy?
Why or how did Carl catch my attention? Why did I allow him to enter my life? Why did I bring down my ever-so-sturdy wall for him?
Why do people hurt other people? What allows them to take advantage of you?
What could be the main reason not to show up in a place that could forever change a person's life?
Is it right to just disappear?
Is it right to make someone laugh so hard then make them cry?
The world is such a mystery. It's a f*ckin' enigma.
I guess I'm tired of feeling that's why I made a blog of the questions that have been brooding my mind.
It's because I'm human. Just like everybody else. I think that's the reason and anyone who knows me is familiar with the fact that no one can damn mess with what I think or my mind.
But that's the thing... I let Carl do it to me. Why did I allow it to happen?
No idea.
All my nerves are gone, I think.
I'm just tired.
Tired of thinking that I'm worthy of loving, living and getting all that back.
Here's to excruciating pain...
Bottoms up!
Cheers.
posted by Lil @ 8:16 AM
9 Comments:
take it easy.. somehow you'll find the answers to your questions..:D
Stop asking question when you know you have the answers to 'em.
Pain is the muse that inspires us to live... :(
And by the way, don't mind Claude. She's having her PMS right now.
It'll take you forever to answer those questions, I can be wrong of course but stop racking your brains off...I bet my bottom dollar that you'll get over that hump.
Don't have the clear answers baby! That's the way it is...
why am i leaving a comment on your blog? why did i read you blog? why did i log on to the internet as soon as i got home? why did i even go home? why do i have a home? how do you define a home? why do we need to define things? why do we need things to define? so many questions... so little time. lol!
so many questions, but the answers are so few...
Jessica's comment made me laugh
The pain of disappointment will never go away. Revel in it; let it remind you that you are capable of loving greatly; of hoping and of dreaming.
You are alive, live.
Post a Comment
<< Home